I Have Anxiety, Now What!?!? Part Two

Comparison is The Thief of Joy

Following up on last week’s blog we are still talking ALL THINGS ANXIETY, as many of us who either experience and suffer from anxiety know or if we have a loved one who suffers- we know ANXIETY AIN’T GOING NOWHERE- but we can sure as hell FIGHT BACK!

Last week’s blog focused on adapting to the mindset of “living presently” in order to keep anxiety at bay and to feel more happiness on a day to day basis. The idea of STOP LOOKING TO THE FUTURE FOR HAPPINESS, and to STOP WORRYING ABOUT THE FUTURE in order to enjoy the present moments.

This week we will discuss, how to not only live presently, but in doing so- by learning that COMPARISON IS THE THIEF OF JOY and to STAY IN YOUR OWN LANE and simply to NOT F**KING COMPARE YOURSELF TO ANYONE ELSE.

 Let’s get started(:

 

Stay In your Own Lane

We are living in the age of technology where our primary news source is often Twitter, where we learn the gender of a baby along with the parents via instagram, and where we get into all out political wars on Facebook. We shop and our marketed products through social media and whether we like it or not we are forming everyday opinions about life situations and people via social media based on our perceptions of what we see.

We feel like we know people whom we haven’t even met through seeing an intimate and what we think of as an “authentic” view into their lives through what they post, when in reality we are just seeing their “Highlight Reel” of how they want us to think their life is- and usually that’s “perfect”.

Whether you would say you’re a social media person or not, I humbly will say it’s almost Impossible to not engage in it- in some way, shape or form.

We are all humans, and even if you aware or not- it’s only natural to want to compare yourself to others- but like anything in life– it’s APPLES TO ORANGES- as NO two lives and two paths are alike- so with that STOP F**KING COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS!

 

Apples to Oranges

Ever have a day where you feel like maybe your starting to hit your stride in life- and that you feel like your exactly where you need to be- then suddenly you go on Facebook and see yet another engagement or yet another person having a baby- and suddenly SHEER PANIC.

You went from “Being Exactly where you need to be” all the way into the distant future of not feeling like you’re anywhere close to “where you need to be.”

YOU may ask yourself, “Why am I not pregnant”, “Why am I not married”, “Am I behind in life?”

While yes- having a baby or getting married these are all amazing milestones in life that bring happiness and joy however they are not the recipe for success and happiness in life, they are additions to the happiness we must find within and I think often that’s what is the most misleading, that we think that suddenly by achieving these milestones- we will be happy forever. We must instead learn to find happiness in everyday moments, through living presently and not comparing.SCREW THE OUTDATED BLUEPRINT that we have been taught to follow and write your OWN!

Different Strokes for Different Folks!

In these moments, where you feel like your not enough- remind yourself that you are. All of that “behind the scenes self work” that maybe we aren’t all privy to- those are the BIG MOMENTS.

The moments where you decide that

 

1. You ARE ENOUGH
2. That YOU DESERVE TO GET THE LOVE YOU GIVE BACK
3. THAT YOU DECIDE TO NEVER SETTLE
4. THAT YOU DECIDE THAT YOU WILL FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS WITH EVERYTHING YOU HAVE

YEP- that stuff just isn’t comparable and we won’t reach our milestone moments at the same time because life IS NOT comparable. There is no scale for success, just the outdated blueprint that society has provided to us.

 

INSTANT- GRAM

 

The biggest lesson I have learned personally upon entering into the social media and blogging space, is that truly there is so much behind the scenes work that WE NEVER SEE others do on their path to being “successful”.  9/10 I would say that “success” just doesn’t fall into one’s lap, and if it does- honestly it’s most likely not that worthwhile, because for me I believe success is only sweet when earned and can only be appreciated if earned.

ANYWAYS-NO ONE JUST IS successful one day- but often social media can make everything look so INSTANT- I MEAN “INSTA- GRAM”. SO, some days I start to feel like I have my “shit together” and that I feel like okay we have a system going here then LOL………

I DO IT- I’ll go on my favorite bloggers Instagram and suddenly I feel RAGING PANIC. The same feeling we may see when we see like ten engagements in a row on the GRAM- SHEER PANIC!

I Think:

 “ OMG SHE LITERALLY HAS THE BEST AESTHETICS.” “SHE HAS HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF FOLLOWERS.” “SHE HAS THE PERFECT HUSBAND”,  “THE PERFECT BABY”- UGH HER LIFE IS SO PERFECT.

Suddenly, I go from feeling PROUD too feeling like this will never “take off” and that everything being done is a failure. Suddenly I am stressed that my life doesn’t feel so “put together” all because I don’t have what someone else has-

 YET.

Guess What!??!

My favorite blogger has been blogging for ten years straight. Essentially, she is one of the pioneers to the blogging industry.

She has a “How to Blog book” and she talks about how literally every day for 10 years how she has been pumping out content in order to see what works and what doesn’t with her follower base.

Trial and error- FOR TEN YEARS STRAIGHT. Those hundreds of thousands of followers?? Those were built over the course of TEN YEARS. Roughly 3,650 days of putting herself out there, building trust and a community all through her hard work EVERYDAY for some 3,650 DAYS!!!

Shit- I’m not even 365 days in- and for some reason I thought we were worthy of comparison?!?!

NOPE NOT ANYMORE.

I’m learning to think about my life in terms of MY LIFE and my BLUE PRINT.

SCREW THE OUTDATE BLUEPRINT FOR SUCCESS- MY WAYS WORKS BETTER  FOR ME.

SO yeah, comparing myself to my favorite blogger who has been at it for ten years- when I’m not even a year in NO MEREY NO– not even on the same playing field.

 

STAY IN YOUR OWN LANE.

WE ARE NOT COMPARABLE.

 NO TWO LIVES CAN BE COMPARED

 We ALL START FROM DIFFERENT SPOTS AND WILL LAND DIFFERENTLY

 

 These may seem so obvious, but with our day in age and the accessibility of seeing someone’s play by play of their days and all their accomplishments it’s almost impossible to not compare, especially without even realizing the impact it has on you long term. We are all so capable of truly accomplishing and becoming anything that we “dream of becoming”, but that doesn’t mean that we cannot be happy until that happens.

LIVE PRESENTLY.

Right now we are living through history, and within the past 5 months are lives have been turned upside down in every which way possible. NO MATTER HOW AMAZING someone’s Instagram looks- I believe we are all struggling in some manner- remember that and DO NOT COMPARE!

 

Repeat after me, and don’t stop until you believe it.

 

“Anxiety is what you may have, Anxiety is not who you are.”

 

End Scene

 

In conclusion, your Physical and Mental Wellbeing should always be your #1 priority and I think by adapting to learning to live more presently, and to learn to not compare yourself you are starting an amazing journey towards happiness and away from anxiety. Having Anxiety does not make you WEAK, you are strong for fighting, never give up.

 

Key Take-Aways

-No two lives our comparable, and comparison is truly the thief of joy.

-Live as in the moment as you can.

-Allow yourself to be happy along the journey.

-Allow yourself to “feel the feels”.

-Do what you love, say what you feel.

-Don’t Fucking compare Yourself to Anyone.

 

” And If I can ask you all just one thing- for the sake of the world and it would be- go after whatever it is in life you want, and never forget to stop and to enjoy the moments it takes to get you there.”

 

NO matter the path or how long, or how many turns it takes- KEEP GOING, DON’T STOP and NEVER FUCKING COMPARE YOURSELF.

Don’t rob the world of the gifts only YOU can provide.

 

 ROCK ON, BE YOU (ONLY YOU), LIVE PRESENTLY.

 

 

Dedication: And this week’s blog is dedicated to my brother Johnny on his 30th birthday. We’ve always been super competitive with one another, but this year I will admit you will always beat me at one thing- You will always be older then me (:

Go ahead and show him some love on his 30th!!! 

Vibes
Xo,